Advice Blog / About

Rekindle the Love

Get Romance and Passion Back in Your Marriage

It is possible to rekindle love in your marriage. If you feel that you have lost that loving feeling in your marriage, you should know that it is possible to get it back. You can fix your unhappy marriage.

If your out-of-love spouse is willing to work with you to rekindle love in your marriage, you’re probably wondering what to do.

Suggestions to Rekindle the Love

In many cases it is helpful to be direct and ask specifically for what you want without criticizing your spouse. Use a friendly attitude and voice when you speak with your partner. When you rekindle the love in your marriage, your approach will depend on how damaged your relationship is; for example, whether or not infidelity is involved.

If you or your spouse has had an affair there are free marriage tips on overcoming infidelity as well as free tips about stopping divorce. I also have a self-help program called Survive an Affair.

If you are on good, friendly terms and trust the good intentions of your spouse to repair your marriage you can try friendly requests to help rekindle the love.

Rekindle The Love Suggestions

  • A Small Sampling of Possible Requests:
    • Will you spend 15 minutes with me after you get home from work?
    • I’d like to have some alone time with you tonight.
    • Will you sit with me for maybe an hour after we put the children to bed?
  • Arrange to have a candlelit dinner, perhaps with some wine. If candles are impractical, make it quiet and emotionally intimate in other ways.
  • Have breakfast in bed together and take an easy morning.
  • Arrange to take a moonlit walk together.
  • Do you watch TV or movies together? If so, touch, hold hands, lean your head on his or her shoulder.

Think about what your spouse wants in your relationship. If you don’t know, learn through discussion with your spouse.

Be patient-you may have been told a hundred times over the years about what your spouse wants and you were not listening-imagine your spouse’s frustration now.

If communication is challenging for you and your spouse, you can put effort into learning how to actively listen – a communication exercise for marriage.

Additional Pointers for Success at Rekindling Romance

  • Avoid criticism in your talks, so don’t say, “You never talk to me anymore.”
  • Try something positive like: “Let’s sit down with a glass of wine or cup of coffee and talk about your day.”
  • Don’t criticize yourself by saying things like “I must bore you.”
  • You want to attract your spouse to rekindle love and desire, rather than chase him or her away.

I wish you abundant success at rekindling your love and getting the romance back into your marriage.

Expert Help to Save Your Marriage

Some relationships are beyond what you can repair yourself without expert intervention. If your marriage has deteriorated beyond these suggestions, you can work directly with me either through marriage counseling sessions or a marriage retreat. You may also call me directly by contacting me.